Notes on a night on the town and manhood

A handsome man walks into a bar. Very handsome. A even more handsome version of Johnny Depp, who, I am told, is very handsome. Every woman in that bar becomes mortal enemies. None of those girls is willing to let anyone else run of with him. Every woman in that bar, hate each other. I am talking about wishing that all the other women were dead. They want him for themself.

The worlds most beautiful woman walks into a bar. Seriously hot. If no one has claimed her as his, and no one expresses true love for her, all the straight males in the bar turns into the worlds most organised team. They all know that only one can take her home, but they know that someone has to.

There is a special bond between men. I would not call it a psychic connection, but an ancient common conciousness, that steps in. Women, wrongly, interprets it has men not growing up, but, when men are together, we grow beyond adulthood. Put two completely random men in the same room, and within ten minutes, they might as well have known each other for a hundred years. An ancient friendship that began with the first two men and has been inherited through the ages.
When men fight, it is
A: They are assholes who don't understand the bond, and is misinterpreting it as homosexuality (not that there is anything wrong with homosexuals, who are, most I have met, anyway, good people), which scares them. The fear is channeled into rage. When that happens, they feel a desperate need to prove how manly they are, using their twisted image of masculinity. These people are violent and stupid, and has misunderstood everything about being a man. Perhaps they even hit women.
B: They both love the same woman. Now, as I said, men knows that only one of them can take the girl (Unless she specifically says otherwise), but if they love her, they will fight to the death over her.
C: Pride. Now, male pride can make men do stupid things. That's no secret. If they hype each other up to a fight, they have to go through with it. They don't want to be a chicken.

Perhaps I should write something about latent homosexuality. Personally, I don't believe in that. And as I said, I don't mind homosexuals, but saying that men are latent homosexuals are somewhat like saying that gay men just haven't found the right girl yet. I don't mind Freud, I just think that he was a perverted cocain-wreck who dealt in pseudo-science. I have nothing against psychiatry, just Sigmund.

Anyway, the beautiful woman enters the room, none of the men knows her. They could fight over her, but these men are friends. If one sees it from the outside, they might have throught that these men wrote down a masterplan before they got here, but no, the organisation in wooing a girl is spontanious. The ancient bond.