Friday, November 20, 2009

Educating [CENSORED]

Ashley came into my house, went into the fridge, popped open a can of beer and sat down on my couch, as she usually does on a friday.
"You will not believe the day I had today", she said to me.
"Tell me about it. I have been trying to unlock characters in Mario Kart all day, but 150 cc is freakin' hard".
"So, we were asked to write a new homepage for the university. Today was the presentation. I showed up 30 minutes early, to set up the computer and the projector, and my Boss was already there. He was angry with me for now showing up an hour early, despite it only taking a few minutes to set it up. So I told my boss exactly what I throught of him. Just a long torrent of swears and insults. Like [CENSORED] and [VERY CENSORED] and [YOU BETTER BELIEVE CENSORED]".
"You don't say that about a guys grandmother. That is just plain wrong".
"Yeah, so in the middle of it, the president of the university showed up".
"He was early?"
"No, right on time. It was a lot of swears".
"Half an hour of insults?"
"No, he showed up in the middle of it. So, about an hour".
"So you were fired?"
"No, I quit. The president offered me a better job. The university is starting a new class: The Art of Insults and the Language of Swears. And I am the new teacher".
"No kiddin'?"
"Yep. Double my old salary".
"I don't see you as a teacher".
"I never even saw myself ever employed. I am a liberal arts major".
"By all rights you should be begging in the streets".
"Yep. But such is life. Cheers".